Broken Trust, In Need of Mending
by TeamImprov
Summary: Set during Muscle Car Paper Clips, What if Jack really did hurt Mac and it wasn't so easy for Mac to forgive him? Originally posted on tumblr.


Request from geminidaydreamer on tumblr: "There has been a few already written about Muscle Car + Paperclips but if you can write a story about where Jack does hurt Mac and he doesn't forgive it that easily? I mean he's not mad, mad but they did just brush off their confrontation too fast."

**Broken Trust, In Need of Mending**

"_Don't make me hurt you, Mac."_

Mac knew Jack was a fiercely protective person.

If you were one of the lucky ones able to get close enough, there was nothing in heaven or hell, or anywhere in between, that could stop Jack Dalton from ripping the world apart to save you.

That highly tuned instinct in Jack had saved Mac's life more times than he could count in the years he had known the man. Mac was the first to admit their relationship had been…rocky when they first met, but something monumental changed between them in the first two months they had spent in the Sandbox together.

Mac was pretty sure he had won a kind of begrudging respect from Jack when he could actually hold his own in a fight against the more seasoned solider. The fact that he matched Jack blow for blow, never once showing weakness or cowering from a hit, not to mention the fact that Jack was the one in his chokehold when their fight had been broken up, had surprised the older man. Of course, you had to be at least somewhat tough to join the Army, survive basic training, and get deployed but Mac had proven himself slowly over the course of those sixty-four days.

It took a while before their relationship got to the overtly co-dependent, joined at the hip, can't be away from each other for too long level that it currently was but in that time, Jack had made a solemn promise to Mac - he would never intentionally hurt the kid again.

Mac had believed him.

For maybe the first time in Mac's life, he one hundred percent trusted that another human being would not, in any way shape or form, hurt him.

So why was he sitting in a car with Cage with a swollen jaw and an indent that looked suspiciously like the outline of Jack's favorite ring?

"Wanna talk about it?" Cage asked. Mac shook his head, no, and sunk down a little more in his seat. His left hand coming up to hold his sore jaw and stared out the window, wanting to think about anything but what had just happened.

Jack wasn't the only one who was fiercely protective of their little family, Mac was, too.

He would gladly give his life to save any of them. He would put himself in the line of fire and take a bullet or a beating – anything – if it meant Jack, Riley, Bozer, and Matty were safe, which is why he got in the way when Jack was going to put Riley and himself in unnecessary danger by running into that warehouse blinded by worry. Mac knew what Riley meant to Jack. He had known her since she was twelve and was clearly her father figure. Mac knew losing her would kill Jack. He also knew how capable and smart Riley was. She could handle herself. Things went wrong on missions all the time and it was kind of in their team's wheelhouse to get themselves out of tight spots by improvising their way out.

If given the opportunity, Riley would be fine. Mac respected and trusted her as an agent and a friend. However, if Jack ran in guns blazing, he was only going to get her killed. That was a guarantee.

Jack should have been able to see that, too, but he clearly wasn't thinking rationally anymore.

And that's why he got in the way, because Jack was going to get Riley killed, because Jack wasn't thinking clearly and Mac didn't want him to do something he wouldn't be able to take back, and because Mac never in a million years thought Jack would actually hit him that hard. Or at all, but damn, he really put his weight behind that one.

One moment Mac was trying to keep Jack from doing something stupid, the next he was hitting the ground and spitting out a mouthful of blood.

Jack stared down at him in horror, face pale as his fist trembled.

"Jesus, kid…" Jack whispered and went to help him up but Mac flinched. Mac flinched which made Jack flinch back, too, afraid to hurt him again, afraid to scare the kid he thought of as his brother…what had he done? "I'm sorry."

"It's fine." Mac said, too quickly, and stood on his own. He wavered for a second, his hand cradling his jaw and backed away a step. "I know how important she is to you, Jack, she's important to me, too. That's why I can't let you go in there. She's fine. If you hadn't turned off your comms you would have heard it, too."

"I didn't mean to do that…" Jack whispered again as he turned his comms back on. "She's okay?"

"Yeah, Jack, she is."

"Are you?"

"Yes." Mac said coolly before pushing past Jack. "Riley did it, she's in." He said into his own comms, his voice breaking slightly.

"Good, because Jack's out." Matty said angrily. She had clearly heard everything and her voice was sharper than any of them had heard it in a long time.

"Matty…" Jack started but Matty immediately cut him off.

"No Jack, you nearly blew this entire op and you assaulted your partner. You're emotionally compromised, Jack, and you're coming home."

"Yes, ma'am." Jack said and turned back to his partner, guilt radiating off him in waves, but the younger man was already halfway down the alley. Jack wanted to go after him and apologize, beg for forgiveness if he had to, but he couldn't get his feet to move. He messed up in so many ways and might have, with one mistake, destroyed one of the most important relationships he had ever had in his life.

"_Don't make me hurt you, Mac."_

Jack couldn't believe he said that and he certainly couldn't believe he followed through.

Maybe he really was too emotionally compromised. In that moment, Jack realized he had to back off a little. He stayed with it enough to save Riley and end the mission, but he knew that as soon as everyone was safe, he was going to owe his partner a huge apology. He just hoped this wasn't the straw that broke the camel's back when it came to the trust they shared. He couldn't lose Riley, but he couldn't lose Mac just as much.

Mac was suspiciously quiet at their post-mission Pizza and Skee-ball lunch, and nobody pushed him to talk more than he willingly did. He seemed normal enough to anyone who didn't know him, and who didn't know how he acquired the huge bruise adorning the entire side of his face.

Jack felt guilty every time Mac smiled with only half his face, when the others shot Jack almost imperceptible glares every time the kid flinched when Jack moved too quickly.

He waited until everyone else was busy playing various arcade games before he found Mac sitting alone at the table, spinning a bottle cap around aimlessly.

"Hey kid," Jack said and hesitated before sitting next to him.

"Hey." Mac said, not glancing up from the cap. When he finally did, his eyes were filled with so many emotions Jack didn't even know where to begin to decipher them. There was sadness, resignation, hurt, relief, loneliness…all swirling around in those piercing blue eyes.

"I don't even know where to begin here, kid." Jack said and Mac cocked his head to the side in puzzlement.

"I don't know what you're talking about," he said accusingly. Jack sighed, the kid was angry and Jack deserved every ounce of it.

"I never should have hit ya," Jack said. "I don't why I did that."

"It's okay, Jack." Mac said and Jack realized what was different with Mac's voice. Jack hadn't heard it since their fight in the sandbox, back when they still hated each other. Jack felt a painful stab in his heart that Mac could feel that way again.

"It's not okay, man. I promised I would never hurt ya and that's exactly what I did."

"I can take a punch." Mac said defiantly. "You didn't hurt me, okay. Is that what you want to hear? I understand why you were upset, I really do. You don't have to keep apologizing."

"Yes, I do, Mac, because I know how much I messed everything up and I'm afraid to lose you." Jack told him.

"You're not going to, I'm right here." Mac said, sighing. "Riley is the closest thing you've ever had to a family of your own. She was in danger and it was only natural that you would fight to protect her. I got in the way."

Jack didn't know what to say to that. Where did Mac get the idea that Riley was the only one he considered his family? Yes, he knew her when she was a little kid but Mac was just as important, just as much a part of his life. Mac shook his head suddenly and quickly stood, the light caught a faint glistening in his eyes and Jack watched helplessly as Mac made a beeline for the door.

Jack glanced around desperately only to find everyone else in their little family staring at him sadly.

"Go Jack," Riley said. "I don't know what exactly happened between you two but I do know one thing, you've got to fix it."

Jack nodded, gritting his teeth in determination and followed Mac outside. It took him a second to locate the missing blond but he finally found him leaning against his Jeep, absentmindedly rubbing his sore jaw. Jack swallowed and took a few steps toward his friend, wanting to wrap him in a big hug and take away the pure devastation on Mac's face but he knew he couldn't. He had been the one to put it there.

"_Don't make me hurt you, Mac."_

"Mac," he started but the kid straightened quickly, clearing his throat, and began pacing.

"I made a mistake. I should have known better" he said, brokenly. "It's my fault, Jack."

"What are you talking about right now?" Jack asked, catching Mac by the shoulders and forcing the kid to look at him. His eyes were brimming with unshed tears and Jack's heart broke at the sight. He couldn't believe how badly he had messed this one up.

"When my mom got sick, I didn't know how to help her. When she died, I thought it was my fault because she couldn't just focus on getting better because she had to take care of me. My dad wasn't the same when she was gone. He was so angry and distant. Every time he looked at me, I could see it in his eyes that he hated me. He loved her and she died and then he was stuck with me so of course he left. My grandfather was there as much as he could be but he had a heart condition and the stress of raising a child made it worse and then he was gone, too. Alfred Pena took me under his wing and helped me through all my EOD training and then he got killed under my watch, Bozer has been my best friend for most of my life and I lied to him and then brought him into this life where we nearly get killed every day and he got stabbed, Jack. And then you and Riley, I know you didn't like me for a long time but then we got so close and I started seeing you as a father figure and look how many time's you've nearly died. And Riley, too. She's your family and was in trouble, you just wanted to be there for her, and I got in the way. I got in the way of your family and Riley could have been killed because of it. I'm so sorry, Jack."

Jack stared blankly at the man he had always seen as a son and slowly comprehended what Mac was telling him.

"Are you saying you think it's your fault all those things happened, that it's on you?" Jack asked and Mac shook his head, no.

"I'm saying I've only ever gotten in the way." Mac said. "And the people I care about suffer because of it. I projected onto you my own feelings and convinced myself you felt the same way. I overstepped boundaries and got in the middle of you protecting the person who's been like a daughter to you for the past fifteen years because I wanted it to be true that you thought that way about me, too. It was selfish and I'm sorry."

"You don't think I care about you the same way I do about Riley, that I don't see you as family?" Jack couldn't believe what he was hearing. He knew the kid had abandonment issues that could keep a psychiatrist busy for a few decades, but he didn't think it was so bad he would think even Jack didn't care about him.

_Probably shouldn't have punched him in the face, then._

"I'm sorry it got so complicated, I'll back off." Mac said and Jack could only shake his head in terror. He felt his own eyes fill with tears and pulled Mac in close, wrapping his arms around the kid's thin shoulders and held him tight against his chest. Mac tensed at first, clearly unsure of what to do, but soon relaxed. He didn't hug back, Jack noticed, but he accepted the embrace. That was a start, Jack supposed.

"Now you listen to me, kid, and you listen good, okay?" Jack started, his voice thick with emotion. He waited for Mac to nod before continuing. "Now, I do love Riley like a daughter but I also love you like you're my own son. You're right, when we first met we didn't like each other but you should know better than anyone how much that changed. It didn't just change for you and you are certainly not overstepping any boundaries by thinking we're family, do you understand me?"

He felt Mac pull away and Jack let him go. There was an even more impossible to decipher array of emotions playing out across the kid's face and Jack waited silently.

"You hit me." Mac finally said in a small voice and Jack sighed. He knew that one single second of blind stupidity was going to haunt him for the rest of his life. He was going to regret that until his final day and then maybe beyond.

"I am so sorry." Jack said, a tear escaping down his cheek. Mac watched it fall curiously. "I never should have done that, you were only protecting me and Riley and I was too messed up about the whole situation to see it."

"It's so stupid," Mac said, eyes shifting toward the ground, clearly embarrassed. "I've been on my own for a long time; I shouldn't be getting jealous that you were so protective of Riley."

"Now you and I both know it wasn't that I was worried about Riley that's got you so upset, it's that I literally went through you to get to her, and no matter what that was wrong. This isn't a petty sibling rivalry, in trying to protect one of my kids, I punched the other so hard I can see the imprint of my fist in his face. I would understand if you couldn't forgive me for that, and I know I have to earn back your trust, but just know this, bud, you are not on your own."

Mac's lips tightened, his eyes misting again and he nodded.

"Good," Jack smiled. "You want to go home or go back inside. It's up to you, hoss."

"Let's go back in." Mac said and Jack wrapped an arm around his shoulders. Mac sniffed loudly, swiping a hand down his face as they walked back to the front door.

"You know, I think we're going to need a Die Hard marathon after the week we've had." Mac joked. Jack could hear the slight resistance in his voice, that part of them that still needed mending, but it told Jack that their relationship wasn't too far gone. It would take time, but it was possible to get back what they lost.

"I think that's a great idea, bud." Jack said, pulling him a little closer as they walked.

"_Don't make me hurt you, Mac."_

The words still hung heavy in the air around them but it was a start. That's all Jack could ask for.

"_I promise, kid, I will never hurt you again."_

And he would never go back on that promise.

Riley watched out of the corner of her eye as Mac and Jack walked back in. Jack's arm was slung around Mac's shoulder. The younger man looked weary, but he was smiling. Riley didn't know what happened to them during her op, but she could tell it had been bad, could figure out if she thought about it for more than a second where that horrible bruise on Mac's face had come from.

Something had gone seriously wrong between the two of them this time and all Riley could do was hope that whatever it was wouldn't ruin them completely.

Nah, she thought, they'll find their way back.

They always did.


End file.
